Posts tagged vignette

I’m not a fighter. I’m a lover of your wife. Soon to be ex-wife. You didn’t take care of her, you didn’t make her forget about me. You never made her feel like I can with just a few touches. You’d forget that you could screw the cap back on your cheap whiskey and pass out leaving her wet and wanting. She’d call me and I’d take her somewhere you couldn’t.

Now she’s mine again and I won’t let her go again.

I took her at face value which wasn’t much but it was enough to win my heart. I told her a thousand times she was beautiful but she didn’t believe me. Maybe because I never really meant it. She was mine though and she was special to me. It hurt that I never found her beautiful and I hoped one day a better man who did would take her away from me but it never happened and I finally had to let her go.

This should be a younger man’s pain. A younger man’s fight. Someone with every girl in front of him not with two wives behind him. Yes, I could be your father. No, I couldn’t be anymore in love with you. I’ve never felt like this before. I feel crazy and it’s driving me mad. I need you in my life. I need you to be with me. Please be with me. I love you. Marry me.

It was nine-o-clock on a Saturday and I was drunk enough to smoke. Piano man was playing on the jukebox. We all sang along. Those who didn’t know the lyrics hummed the first syllables of words and faked the rest. It was a good time. A good night. Then I saw her standing there staring at me. This must have been her bar but I didn’t know it. It’s been over a year and people change. This place was too high class for the woman that said I dented her universe. I could see her collecting her confidence off the floor to walk over to me and I turned away. I didn’t want to deal with this. I was here to forget about someone not ignore people.

She walked over with her head high and her ass out. She remembered something about me.

Driving in the storm, every sharp turn seemed like it could solve my problems. I was in debt for a degree that has done nothing for me. A broken promise from society’s core. I had a brother with everything and did nothing for it. Good looks and luck. The right places at the right times. I did everything right and there was no place for me. I didn’t gamble with my future and still lost everything. It wasn’t fair. It wasn’t right.

I shouldn’t be doing what I’m doing for money.

Her energy made my eyes bounce with her body. I looked down and she was gone but the smile she gave me will last for weeks as I passively search for her on campus.

I showed her what a man could do and she wanted more. I didn’t turn her into a whore. She always been one lying dormant in a virgin’s body. Her parents did it too her. Denied her everything, even a stable childhood. She needed a vice and I gave it to her. I gave her something that could clear her mind for a moment the first time and last longer for ever orgasm after. I gave her peace.

I love you so much it almost breaks time for me. I’d live and die in your arms in one moment if you never had to let me go. Time has no meaning with you.

I could have been better but never good enough for you. You needed more than just a guy. You needed a man and I was still too much of a child for you. I always would be. It’s how I was raised. The guilt made me stop doing things I loved. I stopped cooking for you. Stopped fucking you like you loved. Stopped calling you baby doll and you stopped being mine.

I’d hate to find out that the only things I like about myself are medical problems, something that can be cured with a pill. That this amazing beauty I feel will go away with the lows that get me in trouble. Will my turn of phrase and outlook change so much that i’ll feel like a stranger to myself? I already feel different enough.

My open mind closed you in my arms and let me feel how gentle a woman could be to another. You kissed like I always wanted to be kissed and touched my body slowly. My body ached for you and you knew how long to let me hurt. Soft skin that been treated as good as mine. Soft lips that kissed all my spots. Hard bites to remind me you knew what you were doing. Teaching me to do things I already knew how to do. You held me after then gave me the sweetest goodbye.

Karma owed me a few more heartbreaks but this one seemed to take me to a place I didn’t think normal people could go. I was dark and dried on the inside. The tears stopped but would start up again randomly. When my mind went blank and I felt what it must be like to be dead. I liked how it felt and knew I wanted to feel it forever.

She had the type of breasts that could slap you in the face from a good distance and the attitude that made you want her mad at you.

I’d sit in the bath watching her keep young for me. Lotions, creams, and oils, everything to keep her skin young and tight. She’d do it to stay beautiful for me even though with every year she seemed better. She had yet to hit the point where her beauty would start to decline and with everything she used she might be able to fight it off for another decade.

Why aren’t you driving home to me tonight? I know your car couldn’t make it and it takes money to fly. But I’d be better to you. I’d be better than me. Much better than him. I would worship your body and mind and we’d laugh about how we don’t have souls.